French kissing

The French Kiss was invented so that when French men kissed each other, so that their beards wouldn’t act like velcro and stick together hindering them when putting their hands in the air to
surrender quickly when required.

The methodology (it also works for French women’s facial hair) is to approach the other person at a 38 degree angle, using tongues to ensure that garlickly saliva flows down both faces, preventing a catastrophic adhesion.

The mouths are kept open for breathing, so that the amount of rancid odour is minimised. In later years, French people smelled so appalling they developed the “air kiss” which limits any contact between disgusting French people and real human beings.

(sent by Lucifer DeVil, thank you)